17 Things North Carolina Should Ban from Restrooms Instead of Trans People

1. Brazilian wandering spiders

2. Harpoons

3. Fruit-scented body sprays

4. Trepanning

5. People who stand very quietly examining themselves in the mirror two feet from your stall while you're trying to poop. 

6. Ritual sacrifices

7. Deep-fat fryers

8. Negative self-talk

9. People having spiteful, intentionally demeaning conversations with their exes in the stall next to you while you're trying to poop.

10. Acro-yoga

11. Pizza, unless you brought enough for everyone. 

12. Nail guns

13. Communicating with the dead

14. Polychlorinated biphenyl

15. Body shaming

16. Small children who peek under partitions

17. Eels